corrective pencil marks

"Like a letter covered with corrective pencil marks, I have my defects. After all, I am not strong to begin with, and I believe even Hercules fainted once." -Lydia Davis, "Kafka Cooks Dinner"

Despite its morose namesake, mostly this blog is about how funny and charming I think I am, and whatever other word vomit I want to throw up on you.

If you're dying for it, click above to see more about me or to see a list of tags but they are mostly wildly out of date because I've given up on being a consistent or overly useful tagger.

Basically, though: Amanda. 25. Montreal-born, New York-livin'. BA Psych from McGill. Graduate Diploma in Public Relations & Communications Management, also from McGill. I feel the need to bring up my schooling because people need to know for as long as I'm still paying the debt. (So: for the next 10 years, give or take.)

Also, I used to work as a comedy publicist but now I work as a TV/entertainment writer. I also don't know how it happened.

Click the little green icons below to get at me elsewhere on the internet.
Recent Tweets @amandamichl

sourwolves:

beacon nine nine (2/?)

(via felicitysmock)

238 plays
Jenny Lewis With The Watson Twins,
Rabbit Fur Coat

Jesus Christ. Remember when Jenny Lewis, Ben Gibbard, Conor Oberst and M. Ward were all on the same song?! Fuck me.

2006 — what a time to be alive!! 

Conor singing Bob Dylan’s part made my 16-year-old self tingly. 

Really enjoyed this piece totally slaying the New York Times for its idiotic critique of How To Get Away With Murder which begins: “When Shonda Rhimes writes her autobiography, it should be called ‘How to Get Away With Being an Angry Black Woman.’”

What a terrible idiot. 

When I first saw that Shonda tweeted at the New York Times giving them shit for crediting her as the creator of the show, my knee-jerk reaction was sympathy. It’s so easy to make an idiotic mistake like that and then, oops, all of a sudden it’s on the internet.

However, the New York Times is not a straight-to-publish kinda outlet. And then I saw what Alessandra wrote.

The New York Times has a team of editors. And an editor, a governing body with control over the outlet’s editorial vision, let this one go through. Thought, “Shonda created the show? Sure, that checks out, it’s about a black woman! And oh, yes, let’s also have one of our white, female writers call a wildly successful black female an ‘angry black woman,’ thereby minimizing all of her accomplishments as surprising coincidences, as successes made despite her being an ‘angry black woman,’ perfect, run with it.”

That piece actually made it into the print edition, which is incredible. 

More incredible than that is the fact that Alessandra has been a TV critic for The New York Times for over 10 years! What the hell?

Bad person, bad feminist, bad writer, and a person who straight up does not watch television. I’m angry with her, and I’m angry with the NYT.

TO THE LEFT!!! 

I saw the premiere of Mulaney months ago.

I’m seeing the mediocre reviews from every outlet.

I’m seeing Fox’s desperate marketing of the show, plastering every bus and billboard in LA.

And yet I will watch every episode and I will love every episode until the day it gets cancelled. 

Because Mulaney is forever my #1 comedy boyfriend and anybody who has anything bad to say about him or about the show can go to the left and die there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But also: remember how bad The Mindy Project used to be? Remember how it’s only juuust getting better in its third season? Fox gave that show like one million lifelines — the network famous for both a) terrible programming and b) cancelling its good programming. I’m sure they trust in Mulaney as they must trust Kaling. I’M SURE OF IT! 

Also, NBC can go kick rocks for passing on Mulaney and for giving the OK on, like, The Mysteries of Laura, and Bad Judge, and A to Z, and whatever other garbage. Go kick rocks at the edge of a canyon and then misjudge the distance between foot and rock and overbalance and fall into said canyon. 

I didn’t get that job I was waiting FOREVER on.

They also CALLED to deliver the bad news. Who the literal eff calls with bad news? Are these people sadists?

They said they’d keep my CV on file for that department but like, lol. OK. That’s what all the girls say.

There was a cockroach

in the bathroom

while I was peeing. 

My FEET were BARE. 

Bye to earth. 

I was held captive by my own need to pee. 

I very nearly tested the strength of mine and Ryan’s relationship by asking him to come kill it while I was peeing.

Instead, I stared at it, tracking its DISGUSTING movements so that Ryan could kill it once I finished.

I was telling a friend in LA about that huge fucking dead cockroach from the other day, and she sympathized, telling me that her time in New York scarred her to the point that she starts whenever she sees something move out of the corner of her eye. 

Instead, she told me, it’s usually just sunlight moving across the floor. 

At that moment I wished she was here so that I could slap her in her face. 

and they never e-mailed me. 

They told me on Monday that I’d hear by Friday, so I’ve been spending this week in agony as I await a possibly life-changing opportunity.

All to not hear back on Friday.

That is honestly the cruelest thing to do, as an HR rep. You’re dealing with people’s lives, here! Even if I didn’t get the job, can you at least tell me? Please? Or at least tell me that you’re still considering?

Honestly!!! 

#FBF to springtime Central Park muggin’ with my BFF (and Ryan) because we’re cute as hell.

#FBF to when I didn’t desperately need to get my hair coloured like I do right at this moment. 

about a found dead cockroach?

What if it’s longer than an inch?

I’M GONNA BURN THIS CITY TO THE GROUND. I CAN’T DEAL. MY APARTMENT IS CLEAN. I LIVE IN A WELL-MAINTAINED BUILDING. WHAT IS HAPPENING? WHY COCKROACHES IN PERFECTLY CLEAN SPACES? THIS CITY IS MY BIGGEST NIGHTMARE!!!!

Ryan asked me what I was gonna do with the dead bug and the answer is obviously NOTHING because what if it CRUNCHES when I pick it up?!

I AM HYSTERICAL!!!!!!!!!!

dirky-dirky-heart:

electricdoc:

jensenacklesmeltsmyheart:

electricdoc:

alonelyangel6:

electricdoc:

thesweetandawesomeqinn:

electricdoc:

stabble1234:

electricdoc:

slendersummerseve:

BITCH I WILL FUCKING CUT YOU



YOU’VE ANGERED THE WRONG FANDOM



You’re going down punk, just you FUCKNG WAIT!! You will learn that this fandom is far worse than you will ever want to know. We may seem soft and shy, but we’re just being NICE! We can be cold, cruel, mean, and make you suffer and wish you had never said what you said. We can send you into the farthest most empty reaches of the galaxy, summon demons to our disposal to make you suffer, and make you feel the feelings that we experience, and don’t fucking think for a single goddamn second that’s easy! The amount of emotions that would boil inside of you would literally kill you. So keep your motherfucking distance and we won’t hurt you, so stay the hell back, asshole. If you so much as insult us one more time, we will bring firey hell upon you and bitch slap you into oblivion. Your move, dildo.



We know how to kill a human and hide the evidence. Your body will never be found, and that is a promise.



You do realize a majority of the fandom are 20 somethings right? or at least in college. We can find you, kill you, and make it look like you killed yourself. Don’t try us :)



jesus christ it keeps getting better and better 

dirky-dirky-heart:

electricdoc:

jensenacklesmeltsmyheart:

electricdoc:

alonelyangel6:

electricdoc:

thesweetandawesomeqinn:

electricdoc:

stabble1234:

electricdoc:

slendersummerseve:

BITCH I WILL FUCKING CUT YOU

image

YOU’VE ANGERED THE WRONG FANDOM

image

You’re going down punk, just you FUCKNG WAIT!! You will learn that this fandom is far worse than you will ever want to know. We may seem soft and shy, but we’re just being NICE! We can be cold, cruel, mean, and make you suffer and wish you had never said what you said. We can send you into the farthest most empty reaches of the galaxy, summon demons to our disposal to make you suffer, and make you feel the feelings that we experience, and don’t fucking think for a single goddamn second that’s easy! The amount of emotions that would boil inside of you would literally kill you. So keep your motherfucking distance and we won’t hurt you, so stay the hell back, asshole. If you so much as insult us one more time, we will bring firey hell upon you and bitch slap you into oblivion. Your move, dildo.

image

We know how to kill a human and hide the evidence. Your body will never be found, and that is a promise.

image

You do realize a majority of the fandom are 20 somethings right? or at least in college. We can find you, kill you, and make it look like you killed yourself. Don’t try us :)

image

jesus christ it keeps getting better and better 

(via churlytemple)

and it sucks. I hate the gym. I hate exercise. I chipped my fabulous nail polish on the rowing machine. The gym is for the goddamn birds.

How does concentrated, purposeful exercise become something that isn’t the most garbage, boring waste of time on the PLANET that also forces me to carefully plan my shower schedule? Anyone?

danielkanhai:

i bought this bonsai tree growing kit for three dollars and i know nothing will probably grow, but who could beat that price, right? after i soak the seed pod for 24 hours i have to keep it in the fridge for three months to trick it into thinking winter has passed. it’s probably the biggest prank i’ll ever pull on a seed. like psych, buddy, you thought winter was over? that was the god damn crisper drawer oh shiiit.

I know that this whole Ice Bucket thing is dumb as hell but it IS legitimately raising money and Chris Evans’s Ice Bucket Challenge video is like, going to give me a coronary. 

If you only watch one Ice Bucket Challenge video, watch this one, and then like, I don’t know, save me from the middle of the road that I lay down in because I can’t deal with him anymore.

Birbigs and Vanessa Bayer at UCB. What. The fuck. Is UP!!!! 🗽🗽🗽🗽🗽🗽 #BEST

joshistheworst:

therealdjqualls:

The 200 Of The Best Decade Tracks So Far

Don’t Dead Open Inside